Robert Oscar Lopez
I waited until the night of Father’s Day to write this, because I couldn’t bear to post it in the midst of all the winsome father’s day specials everywhere–odes to the mentorship, paternal fealty, male role modeling, and caring that everyone attributes to fathers.
I do not want to be covetous, so I am genuinely happy for everyone who has fathers to celebrate and commemorate on this day.
I have a close relationship with my father, but I had to go out of my way to build that from scratch when I was in my late twenties. Some of this is not the fault of my lesbian mother. None of this is really the fault of her partner. Some fault lies in my own reaction to things growing up, my curling up and withdrawing from what was such a confusing arrangement of custodian figures and role models and parental units that I had to protect and shield, when I was still a child who just wanted to be protected and shielded.
Read the rest here.