The Difficulty of Admitting We Want to Be Married

Norman Rockwell
Norman Rockwell

[Editor’s Note: It’s okay to want to get married. Feminism has made it seem a crime. But the Lord has designed us for it and calls us to it. Pity is a dangerous thing, don’t accept it. Self-pity is an addicting sin. It breeds discontentment, insatiable self-interest, makes you emotionally needy, weak and annoying to others, and it feeds the notion that God is not sovereign which leads to faithlessness. You can rest assure that as soon as you feel sorry for yourself, you’ll tell someone. Keep in mind that there isn’t a single person on this plant that doesn’t have something they could sorrow over. Whenever you’re feeling sorry for yourself purpose to go do something selfless for someone in need. If you are taking practical, emotionally mature steps toward helping yourself get married, when people hear of your desire to marry they’ll resist pitying you and instead be inspired by your example. They may even help you find the spouse you’re looking for.]

By Jennifer Adams and Boundless

She looked at me wanting to know what I wanted to do with my life. We were merely acquaintances meeting for a meal and a chance to get to know each other better. She continued, “If you could do anything you wanted, what would you do?” There was nothing about her that suggested I couldn’t trust her with the truth. In that moment I should have said, “I want to be a wife and mom. I want to serve in ministry in the context of a family. I want to be an example of Christ in a marriage, my marriage.” But those words were not the words that came out of my mouth. In all honesty, I’m not sure what I said. I probably said something about wanting to serve in ministry or about wanting to work with young pregnant teens or maybe even about wanting to help in the fight against trafficking. I don’t know. I do know I left off the part about wanting to be married.

Read the rest here

Recommended Resources
Marrying Well: Practical Wisdom on Courtship for Parents and Children
Family Reformation
The Excellent Wife: A Biblical Perspective

One thought on “The Difficulty of Admitting We Want to Be Married

  1. Because to admit that we want to be married, is to invite all sorts of awful scorn from within the Christian community itself.

    If you say that you want to be married you are saying, in the view of many Christians who are, actually, in relationships already, that you are a Barry- or Barbara-no-buddies who is looking for marriage to get round the harsh reality that no-one actually wants you. Not surprisingly, people keep quiet.


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