When we encounter abuse and grapple with the evil it perpetrates, many people often wonder, “Why doesn’t she just leave?” Sometimes the question comes with the judgment “It’s her fault if she doesn’t” The question is better framed as “Why is she choosing to stay?” There are 4 reasons why I have seen women remain in abusive marriages. As we consider each, I will suggest … Continue reading ERLC: Is it Abuse?
In my experience, emotional and psychological trauma survivors seem to worry more than most people that they are being “lazy” when they aren’t 100% productive. Let’s expose that lie, shall we? Read the rest here Continue reading The Mighty Reports on Why Trauma Survivors Appear Lazy
I stood on a stage in the church I’d grown up in. I can only vaguely remember my wedding, but I’ll never forget seeing Allison emerge from the hallway at the back of the sanctuary. Beautiful. Looking up at me through her veil, she smiled. She has always been a shy person, so she should have been intimidated by all of those people looking at … Continue reading Reggie Osborne: She Said Yes, Once
I know a woman who married for complex reasons: Her sordid past made her fearful and distrustful—of herself most of all. She met a man who was strong and committed to the faith she had recently discovered. A godsend! Or that’s what she told herself, even when she questioned some of his demands. But perhaps that was her fault; she had tons of sin to … Continue reading Worldmag: Upside-down Headship
Paul tells us in Philippians 2:3-4 that we should count others more significant than ourselves. He presses the point further by saying that we should not only look to our own interests, but to the interests of others. This, in his view, is what it means to have the mind of Christ. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more … Continue reading What is the Difference Between Being Humble and Being a Doormat?
[Editor’s Note: Censoring the books is appropriate and should be suggested. Take the time to read the articles linked to this post.] The film’s opening exposed a deep wound. It needs healing. Whatever happens to the book and film franchise, the real life toll of human torture it exposes has to stay prominent in public debate and social action. It’s been in the shadows for far … Continue reading Deep Wounds That Need Healing
When the novel Fifty Shades of Grey was published three years ago, critics described it as “dull and poorly written,” “depressing” and “a sad joke.” Yet, it sold 100 million copies. Women were fascinated by the dark tale of a 21-year-old college student, Ana Steele, who falls in love with a handsome but mysterious young billionaire named Christian Grey after she interviews him for a … Continue reading Let’s Call ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ What It Is: Perverted
Remember how we warned you about Eclipse from the Twilight series as did others who often publish articles here on Beautiful Womanhood? I’m glad we did and I am glad that some of you listened. The Story: A new study published in the Journal of Women’s Health finds a connection between health risks in adolescent and young adult females and the series of best-selling porn novels that began … Continue reading Fifty Shades, Twilight, and Teaching Young Women To Desire Abusers
The Westminster Shorter Catechism reveals that man’s objective in this life is to glorify God and to enjoy Him forever. Enjoying God does not come naturally to sinful, guilty men or women. More specifically, when women gleefully rejoice in their domestic duties, Christ’s dominion visibly and powerfully manifests itself in that domestic realm. Few greater challenges exist for the Christian woman who has experienced verbal, physical, and/or sexual abuse in her life than for her to obey God’s Word with a guilt-free and undefiled joy from a pure heart, a good conscience, and a sincere faith (1 Tim. 1:5). To truly enjoy God, a Christian woman who has experienced abuse must, as every other believer, obey God’s Word and allow it to transform her mind.
It is certain that abuses are not new under the sun. Nonetheless, this century has been characterized by fathers who have failed to lead and to discipline their families and by feminism, which has attempted to reverse God’s perfect creation order regarding male and female roles, and abuse in families is highly prevalent. Now, many adult women who were cruelly victimized as children are filling (praise to God) Christ’s church — yes, even the Reformed churches. These dear Christian women are finding it difficult to work with their husbands in discipling their families. In addition, these women are troubled by excessive guilt and are in need of Christian discipleship and healing. Continue reading “Joy as a Tool of Dominion for the Abused Woman”
As a young teen, Marie Antoinette came from the cozy family atmosphere of the court of her mother the Empress of Austria to marry the heir to the French throne. Morals were lax at the French court and Marie Antoinette’s higher standards made her plenty of enemies, especially when she snubbed Madame Du Barry, her father-in-law’s mistress. Soon Marie Antoinette became queen, but the gossips hinted that her husband was—in these early years, at least—not interested in her. One rake, the Duc de Biron, thought she might be pining for some male attention and tried to get her alone. Witnesses reported that they heard the queen crying, “Sortez, Monsieur! Get out!” and saw the Duc come running out with a red face.
I like Marie Antoinette, and this story is a great illustration to some of the best advice a young woman will ever hear. I first saw it demonstrated by my mother, then put into words by Nancy Wilson, and more recently re-iterated by Martin Selbrede. It really is critical:
Be rude. Continue reading “Be Rude”